Snowy Christmas Day 2005

Here is a picture of what it looked like in my hometown from the front window of my dad's house on Christmas

I just loved it!

Back from the Holidays

We had lovely Holidays; we went to my Dad’s for Christmas and got 60 cm of fresh snow in 48hrs (Dec. 25-26). We could not resist going cross-country skiing on the 26 but by the time we came out of the woods our tracks were gone, we were up to our knees when we made them. Pretty Impressive.
DH shovelled the path from the driveway to the front door 6 or 7 times in that period… It really looked like Christmas.
We went downhill skiing on the 27, great conditions but by the end of the day there was moguls everywhere and since it was my first time out, my legs where killing me so I stopped early… did not want to take a chance and hurt my self. When we drove back home, DH drove by where Moushka got killed and it really disturbed me. I cried and was really upset for a couple days… I am still really sad and a little depressed because of it.
New Year’s eve was a lot of fun my SIL had a house party with people from the village and the triplets had a bunch of friends over. We had a great time, good discussion, good food, good music, very good drinks. Too bad we had to leave around 12:30AM, DH was working the next morning.
I spent the 1st on the couch, crocheting and watching movies: I,Robot , Manhood, Million Dollar Baby, Mystic River, Shall we dance, She gets what she wants and Raise your voice. Then the next day it was work, work, work to catch up on cleaning and getting ready to do back to work.
So now I am back at work and I got a really short week; I Did not work on Monday and had to leave early on Wednesday because of a migraine… I slept it off but it is still lingering today.
I saw Narnia last night and I loved it… DH too, I think he might read the books now. He had to be in town for a French test, he will start a conversational beginner French course in a couple weeks. I think he found that Christmas in my family was a little long when you cannot communicate. I am pretty excited about that!

Mouchka

Dear Mouchka,

Almost two weeks since you left us and it is so difficult for me to accept. I am still unable to walk or drive by the stretch of road where you got hit.

We got a lot of snow last week, you would have loved it. I can help missing you and feeling sad when I think about going skiing, without you running around.

Last Monday when I got home from work it was so hard to get in the house knowing that youn would not be at the top of the stairs waiting for me with a "present" in your mouth and a cheery welcome.

You are missed everyday

Love

Marie-Jos

Meditation progress

Just over a week now that I am meditating… almost every morning and some nights. I know almost but I skipped only one, I am just too honest. Nights are difficult because I often do things then I get home and I am so hungry, I don’t want to wait and meditate.
I already saw some changes though; yesterday, I felt a giggle in my heart, just happiness without any reason really so I think it is from meditating.
Right now my meditation is about 20 minutes, I read a little before to quiet down, then I do an exercise where you focus on the top on the head repeating simplicity 7 times, then heart with sincerity, after it is the navel with purity, finally the 3rd eye with surety. After that you start again with 3 times saying I am simple, I am sincere, I am pure and I am sure. After that I either look at a flame or breathing techniques.
I think I am thoughtless for about a couple minutes every times, that’s cool!
I am reading the meditation book by Sri Chinmoy… after that I will look for something about prayers that is what I will need to add to my practice.

Meditation Seminar

So I went to the workshop on meditation a couple weekends ago, I could make it to all the session so I finished it this weekend. DH did it this weekend; he was working last week. On Sunday, there was a long meditation in the morning (30 min.) and I felt really weird afterwards; kinda shaky inside, cold… cold seat and confused. Shishir, the speaker said that it is probably because it was too long for a beginner and I push myself which I should not have done. After a while, during the meditation, I was thinking that is long and I had a hard time to keep on going so I ask for help to the universe so that I could keep at it… I should not have, now I will be more attentive to my internal messages.
In the afternoon there was another meditation but Shishir recommended that I don’t do it. I read and a few hours letter I felt better. They talked about there Master Sri Chinmoy and I was sad that they would not take us as students because we are trying to have a baby. I felt a bite like they were showing me the most wonderful meal there is and then they said sorry, you cannot have any. I felt not good enough… but DH and I stick with our plans. I explained that my main goal in following this seminar was that I heard that if you meditate before conceiving the soul I would be bringing to life will really want to come in our family and that afterward that helps this soul having a better life.
They encouraged us to keep on meditating anyway and that maybe later when the kids are older, if kids there are, we could come back. Shishir even came out to talked to us as we were leaving to ask us if we would postponed our project for a 3 months so that we can make the program but no. I talked to DH on our way home to get a sense of if it was what he really wanted and I think so. I kinda consider it because I might not be pregnant in 3 months and then we would have had the time but I can’t go through it knowing that we are trying and kinda lying.

We have a new kitty

I am happy to introduce Lady Rolo ( like the Rolo ice cream... she is the same colour).

She lived under the deck of a friend with the cold arriving , it was me or the Human Society. She is very sweet... and has a lot of energy! It quite a change from the two other adult cats we already have.

After the wedding ... the mariage

And it is great; tomorrow is our second month anniversary…

What I found about wedding/marriage so far:

• It raised my libido; just looking at his ring… on his finger makes me think about it
• It made me feel more secure with my relationship; it is just a feeling, not that I worried about it before that much but just … happy to be together knowing we will stick together

We won’t do anything special tomorrow…

We are going to a talk about meditation with two of my friends. We have been looking into it for a while, we both have done workshop and seminar, and we practiced for a while, then stop and go back later. We will see with this method. DH wanted to go a 10 days intensive but it was scaring me to have to stay away from him for that long (men and women are apart for the whole time) and you have to be in silence 99% of the time… I have to say that I feel better about it since we are married…since I feel more secure (#2)

I would like to practice before I heard that it helps attract the right soul, this soul really want to be with you and choose you as parent. Once the soul is in, the meditation helps this future human being to have an easier life.

I think that the timing is great and that is a good sign that it is for me…will see

We have a website!

Or I should say we have a website address... the website will come a little later mariejo-mike.com Keep an eye for it